You’re Lime Green Jello: A Horror Fashion Review

We made it to the end of September, bitches! The leaves are falling, the smell of artificial pumpkin flavoring hovers in the air, and the best time for all things horror is upon us. This September we all collectively wore our tight zip-up hoodies, sipped our hot chai tea latte’s, and celebrated the 12th anniversary of Jennifer’s Body coming into this world. Also we listened to Hole, lots and lots of Hole. Or was that just me? Whatever, that album still hits and I’m forever in love with it. Well, it wouldn’t really be autumn here at Horror Fashion Review without high school drama, an eaten alive jock, and a demon who’s also a super babe.

Trust me, I know I’m not the first to talk about the outfits in this one. Especially not since it has reemerged as a cult classic with the younger demo. (Thankfully it’s finally getting the cred it has always deserved). I usually stick with my 80s slashers but I’m confronted with my inner fashion demons with this one. I can’t go on in my life as a Horror Fashion Reviewer and critic and NOT say something about Jennifer’s Body. So get in, horror babes, we’re going to 2009. Back to a time when fashion wasn’t on our side and very few horror films made an impression enough to last. (Literally every other horror movie that came out in 2009 sucked with the exception of JB and Zombieland).

For this review its all about Needy and Jennifer Check. Sandbox lovers and BFFs turned arch enemies. Needy, played by Amanda Seyfried and Jennifer Check played by Megan Fox. Both gorgeous, both extremely talented actresses, both complete babes by all definition of babe. They casted this movie perfectly.

Needy is up first. The staples of her outfits are chunky sweaters, cami tees and lots and lots of layering. Hair is usually pulled back, half up, or hiding messily under a beanie. These attributes are set from the beginning and we understand that Needy is supposed to be understated, unassuming, nerdy, not hot, typical normal girl next door.

God the hair is so bad

The chunky sweaters and layers hide Needy’s awesome curves and amazing tits and they do absolutely nothing for her. This is on purpose and we get it. It’s working. Also the glasses with the cockroach-wing colored frames are definitely working on us.

Grandma Cadigan sweater vibe

To add salt to the fashion wounds, Needy’s sweaters are often buttoned or fastened at the very top with the rest unbuttoned and open. Fatal and perfect effect here, this allows her to look at least 2x bigger than she actually is. Bonus, because she has a very nice rack this makes the clothing jet out over her stomach to help create this illusion. All of this plays up the more docile, timid, non-athletic, “average” type of character she’s destined to be. Well done so far.

We honestly die for a lacy tank

Ah the era of the hit-you-at-the-hip-bone low-rise jeans. Let me be clear, especially to everyone who’s young that thinks that shit is cool again, this style of jeans looks good on basically no one. Like, I know I talk some shit, I’m forever judging style, but I’m all about body positivity and having the freedom to wear whatever the fuck you want and whatever makes you happy, but that doesn’t mean everything looks good on you. It’s all about awareness. Just know that you probably look like shit in pants like these. Look at Needy in this photo above. The cute purple lace isn’t enough to pull our eyes away from the lower gut exposure those low rise jeans highlight.

The two plastic bands tied together to make a bracelet is forever an early 2000s capsule

Let me say one thing about why I know Needy and Jennifer are BFFs in the beginning. The tied plastic bands to make a bracelet move is such an inside look into the true depth of Needy. She desperately wants to be a bad girl like her bestie. The darker colors that she wears for the show is also a good insight. When she’s not at school, and out on the town with Jen, she wants to be seen more like her. Needy wants desperately to be her twin rather than her opposite. But at the show, Jen wears white and Needy goes with darker colors. And after all, they do end up being each other’s arch nemesis. It’s interesting how this plays out early on in their outfit choices. Foreshadowing in fashion before the story lets on. We’ve seen this before.

Needy’s layering is definitely an ode to all modest and nerdy girls of the past, but its also deeply rooted in 2009. The American Apparel era style lingered and the zip-up under the dark jean, dare I say, Mossimo-esque jacket with way too many buttons are a scream to the fashions of the time. Layering a solid over a graphic is an iconic old school 90s move and it pairs well with the cross body purse strap. Love it.

Chunky sweater number 2

It’s cool to speculate about how Needy’s outfits could have very well been chosen after Jennifer was in hers. Who knows if this is true, but it really does come across this way in the film. I mean, thinking about Needy as a character, other than a normal basic ass life we don’t really know what she wants. We only find out what she wants when Jennifer goes demon and she has to solve the problem. What was Needy’s goal before that? Do we know? Did she even have one?

chunky sweater number 3

If I believe that fashion can tell a character’s story, then this fashion is telling a story of follow the leader and not much else. Needy is dressed only as an opposition to Jennifer. Or rather, who is Needy without Jennifer? Maybe that’s just it, Needy can’t truly exist as herself in a world where Jennifer exists.

Okay, let’s talk about the fucking dress Needy wears to the dance. Its at this point in time that we are instantly thrust into a world that has absolutely nothing to do with the world we were given so far. What the fuck is happening here? Let me try my best to get this out.

First, if they were trying to do a throwback to old 80s horror films, that’s nice, but it isn’t working. They would have had to be pretty fucking clear about sprinkling in odes to the 80s throughout the film before bringing something like this in. There is nothing else iconic 80s in this entire film visually or aesthetically until this moment. (And no, the Evil Dead baseball tee made in early 2000s doesn’t count). So by the time we get to this scene, we are all pretty damn confused. If this was supposed to be a funny ha-ha moment, the joke wasn’t set up right, it didn’t land, and we are all still wondering what happened.

You know in life when there is a gut-wrenchingly sad situation that is happening to someone very close to you but there is nothing you can do to fix it? This horrid dress reminds me of that feeling.

With what we do know about Needy, we know that she would NEVER wear something like this to a fucking dance. Not even for Jennifer would she wear something so outlandish and go full-on with the hair too. This is what I like to call an “abandonment of character” moment in fashion. One of those moments that I envision the person in charge was calling the shots beyond the wishes of the wardrobe director. And beyond anything that the character was already set-up for. Point is, Needy deserved to have a hot-look. She deserved to have her babe moment and to dress the part, but instead they made her look worse than ever before.

Think about it, how fucking awesome would it have been if Needy and Jennifer were both dressed like ultimate babes in the final battle scene. Like, isn’t that what the film was setting us up for? Aren’t they by this point in narrative ultimate arch enemies fighting to the death? Needy’s fascination with Jennifer falls and she realized that in many ways she’s actually better than Jennifer knows that she is the only one who can stop her and THIS is the dress she pulls out of the fucking closet?! Obviously I’m still torn up about this completely missed opportunity. I’ll never get over it.

Jennifer Check’s character is the babe of all babes, cheerleader goddess, otherworldly beauty, best friend to Needy which no one even in their world understands. The set-up for Jennifer is specific from the beginning with her cheerleader outfit. We know what kind of person she is based on the introduction, just like Needy.

Cheerleader babe that stands out from all the other cheer-girls. This color combination could not look any better on Jennifer. It is SUCH a good color on her with that mustard gold trim? I’m 100% here for it and can’t look away. Its royal, it’s distinguished, it’s original. No one in a cheerleader uniform has ever looked quite this good. They nailed it.

Can we talk about the white cowboy boots with pink fringe and yellow tassels along with the white tights? It’s never been done before in correlation with a cheerleader uniform in a horror movie. So that needs to be mentioned right off the bat. IT IS SO GOOD.

In correct opposition to Needy, Jennifer Check is all about showing her body. You can’t have a movie based on a killer song with the words Jennifer’s Body and NOT have this the center of the film. SO kudos for that, they did it well. Still, these low rise jeans are haunting me. I don’t think they even look good on Jennifer here. Her 90lb frame STILL manages to spill out of the sides of these jeans. They were meant for no-one.

I love how baby-doll Jennifer is portrayed in the beginning. Pinks, purples, whites and lighter wash jeans. Nothing about her in the beginning is dark or fierce. That was a good choice. Also that baby pink super crop cardigan is sooooo cute.

It isn’t until the night of the fire and the night of her demon transformation that we get slightly darker colors from her. The BFF necklace in full effect, a dark grey/purple leopard print top and the white poofy 2009 coat with the fur hood trim. EVERYONE had one of these jackets back then. I had a gold version of this in 2006 with leopard print lining inside. This style didn’t go away for awhile but I’m 100% here for it and thankful for the time capsule. It’s good that she is wearing a white jacket. White is innocence. White is pure. It’s really good that this was matched with leopard print and red fishnets. Good vs. bad is playing a part here.

There is honestly a lot going on with this outfit. Even for 2009. The frayed jean skirt with the studded “LOVE” belt is fucking spot on high school popular girl. The red fishnets with the boots are taking me away. Like, don’t get me wrong it’s definitely a statement, especially with the blood all over them, but would Jennifer have chosen this combination? I believe the red here was chosen to show the nightlife version of her outside the baby hues we were introduced to in school. This also helps with the transformation later that night. A demon dressed in red fishnets makes perfect sense. Ultimately the thing I dislike the most about this outfit is the boots. OG high-top converse would have sealed this look in perfectly.

The high school jock being eaten alive is a wonderful scene. I am removed from it completely by Jennifer’s outfit. I look at it and think I’m supposed to be sailing the ocean in the middle of summer. The stripped yellow and white hooded terrycloth tee with rope-like ties, a skinny white belt on a short jean skirt with white butterflies on the back pockets. It’s almost like they wanted to show so badly that Jennifer was just an innocent baby-doll girl with these choices.

The problem is, everyone knows that she’s not innocent. Even without being a demon she’s unattainable, undatable, unreachable, and certainly not an innocent character. I know what they were going for here but it doesn’t work for me in this scene. Also, isn’t it supposed to be autumn? This outfit is summertime Limited Too vibes. Meaning, it looks too young even for a high school princess.

And here we are, back on track. The pinks are back, the jeans are back – of course it’s a darker wash jean- which we are totally into. The red hearts on top of pink are so good. Great pattern for a cheerleader babe who eats boys. The wedged heels with the straps, another time capsule I can’t help but appreciate. Jennifer would be a wedges girl.

Purples. We know the meaning behind purples. She’s royal, she’s supreme, she’s above everyone and even mores now with her being a demon. Sticking with her color pallet, this quick purple long sleeve moment hits the mark.

Jen can rock a zip-up crop top hoodie ANY DAY

We love the light color pallet for Jennifer, it’s so opposite to what we might’ve expected and it works so well.

The Juicy Couture / Victoria’s Secret Pink line emphasis in these fucking pants and top are too good. Also, we know the 22″ length BFF necklace was not an accident. We are thankful for it.

The only somewhat 80s moment we get before Needy’s disgusting dress choice is the Evil Dead baseball tee with the tube socks that Jennifer wears in the bedroom scene. Incredible choice here for Jennifer to spill the beans on what the fuck went down with the gross band boys.

We love the differences and similarities we can see between Needy and Jennifer in this bedroom scene, it’s a lot of body from Jennifer and yet it’s more skin than we’ve ever seen from Needy. Needy in longer pants, Jennifer has no pants. Needy in a spaghetti strap cami showing all of her arms and neck while Jennifer’s in a longer sleeved baseball tee. You can tell in this moment that Needy is removing the layers of herself so-to-speak and getting closer to the level of her best friend. When they makeout it’s as if they finally are on the same exact level. They are truly each other’s arch enemies before they even realize it. The outfits help us see it. It’s fucking dope.

A demon dressed in white

You all know by now the significance behind light and dark colors and how black and white play off of each other so well in terms of character. Good vs. Evil. Jennifer Check didn’t want this to happen to her. We’ve always been able to understand the trajectory of Jennifer’s character even before she turned. We could understand what she wanted. To move out of the small town and go to the city where she would have become anyone she wanted. We know this early on, in outfit choices and in character development. It allows us to feel sorry for her later on when she’s essentially trapped in this new body.

Jennifer is constantly at odds with her own self after becoming a demon. In the middle between the bubbly perfect life she knew and the dark lonely life she has to sustain in order to survive. The black and white dress for the dance is the absolute perfect choice for this.

When I’m awaiting my fight to the death, please let me be wearing leg warmers. I would say this is another ode to 80s style but in the early 2000s there was a surge of leg warmers. So I could say this plays on both of those aspects. (Still not enough 80s odes to back the fucking dress k).

Also, remind me to get a fake Devil’s Kettle shirt in the design of early 2000s Hollister just like this one for when I die.

I fucking love horror fashion, I love this movie, and though there are a few questionable outfits, it’s still a complete win. Thankful to Diablo Cody for making this one happen, and MOST OF ALL to Katia Stano the costume and wardrobe designer for the film who made all of these outfits happen. Without her efforts and the efforts of every other on-set costumer in horror, HFR would be nothing.

Till next time,

xoxo Grace

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